Back of the net, or over the top?

Wel, the boys did it again yesterday. A sterling victory over Swansea see's the Toon sellotaped to the top of the Christmas tree.

You know, there's nothing finer, than watching 48,000 passionate followers lose it for 2 minutes. Have you seen The Young Ones - 'Bambi'? As Scumbag college is introduced by Bambi, the four of them begin to jump about in their seats and throw their arms everywhere? Now I want you to imagine that four, mulitplied by 10,000, and press slow forward on your video recorder. That is what it looks like when Nolan pops one home!!

Don't get me wrong, I love the game, and along with my brother and friends, used to be the proud owner of a seat in level seven heaven. The air in the atmosphere was thin, but that didn't stop the fun. But I just think, having started to grasp the responsibilities of an adult, that the euphoria displayed when a football player scores, no matter where, from here to Australia, is a tad too far!

Foe example, when I win the lottery, or when I am released from prison after 20 years, I will exert any amount of emotions and be wholly justified in my cries!

When Alan Shearer scored one of his many goal s four years ago, me and another 48,000 nut jobs would adopt the following behaviour..................

"YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, Y' BASTARD........ F**KIN GEDDIN MAN Y' BASTARD!"

This woluld be shouted whilst jumping around like a complete lunatic, hugging a married friend, turning to someone you've never met, shaking two fists at him/her and shouting at them, then repeating the above line again. Once things started to calm down, we were then expected to point at the two thousand away fans, give them the 'v's, call them shit, make wanker gestures to them, and telling them they're going home in a geordie ambulance. It was also prevalent when playing West Ham, to inform these poor sods they were going to be set on fire.

It is my onion, that things need to be chilled in this department of the beloved game. No wonder wars start with idiots like us governing countries like Iraq!!